"Banging body, pity about the saggy tits" NO. NOT OKAY.

Summa Summa Summa Tiiiiiiiiiiime. IT'S SUNNY! IN EDINBURGH! How glorious! However, what is not so glorious is the number of boobs bouncing along Edinburgh's streets, running 'free and loose'. Umm, hello? Have you learned NOTHING!? If we need to take care of our boobs in everyday life (to keep them north) then surely, surely you know that extra care must be take during exercise?

"Gosh, she's terribly heavy footed" "Oh, that's not her feet, she ran for leisure for ten years without a proper sports bra. That's her boobs slapping the floor you're hearing". Nice.

I know they are pricey. But so are gym memberships! And you forked out for that! Or, if, like me, you're a runner, that's free!! So spending on a sports bra is just another piece of kit. "I want to get in shape for my beach holiday" Great. Do so. But unless you want to have to scoop your boobs into your bikini, invest in a sports bra!

I use a Shock Absorber bra which I love. My boobs go nowhere. Much to the chagrin of passing lorries but to my own personal delight. However. It's toight. Like proper toight. I have to do the hooks round my waist, shoogle (yes, it's a technical term) it up to my chest and then do the clasp at the back. I'm not going to lie, the first time I used it I had a slight breakdown with regards to the flap-clasp at the base of my neck. Flap-clasps are tricky anyway, but doing one upside down, in an awkward place, blind, nearly ended me. But now, all fine! It's terribly comfortable and my flatmate's just bought the same one in a funky purple/turquoise colourway. Mine's black, how demure of me.

Ladies, joking aside this is one of the most important bras you will ever buy (up there with maternity and post-op). There's no point working hard to have a banging body if you gain droopy boobs at the same time. And it'll hurt your back too. And if you have a sore back you're more inclined to stoop and then no one can see your rock-hard abs etc etc.

Try on different styles and see what works. It will feel tighter than your normal bras, even in the same size because the elastic is of a much higher tension. This bra has to work hard for you so make sure you find the one that is best suited for your shape and sport. Wash them carefully by hand. Most have wick-away technology so they don't need to be washed after every workout, but definitely more frequently than your normal bras.

I'm running a half marathon on Sunday and have been using the bra since January. My boobs haven't gone anywhere and are, if anything much stronger. Still boobs though. No pecks here, thanks very much Madonna.

Ninja, x

P.S After writing this post I have the Irn Bru advert 'Raoul Likes to Bounce' stuck in my head. Yes, Raoul does like to bounce. Your boobs don't. Strap 'em down.

The invisible power of a simple bra - Interview

Last week, my friend Aga, a stylist interviewed me about underwear for her website Styling Atelier. I refitted her recently and she saw the difference in herself immediately. As a stylist she knew that this was an important discovery. The interview is available on her site, which you should definitely check out, but I thought I'd post it here too :) Ninja, x

We all have some guilty moments from the past, when our bra was just another piece of a fabric used to cover our “pride and glory”. Its style, shape or colour was dictated more by what is available in the store, than the actual shape our body needed. To make matters even worse, most of us wear the same size we wore years ago. Covering it with oversized or sometimes quite tight clothes, we all hope that the beauty of the outside will cover what we wear underneath.
From my experience as a stylist, I know that correctly fitted underwear can completely change the size of clothes, your posture and most importantly how women feel and carry themselves. We all want to look our best before the summer season; planning to exercise more, eat healthier and show off some of our many new outfits, but not many of us, are starting that transformation with a visit to a bra expert.

Why should we change that bad habit and how to do that? I am talking to The Knicker Ninja

Aga Galat-Bracken – KN you have recently corrected my bra size, even though I was professionally fitted before, but I was never advised about the shape of the bra I should wear. Do you have many clients wearing wrong size or wrong shape for their breast?
KN – Heaps! It is very rare that I have a customer who knows her correct bra size. There are so many outlets offering ‘bra-fitting’, but I swear sometimes they just fit you into whatever size they have in stock. It’s terribly disappointing. A lot of women immediately flock to the plunge bra to give them ‘oomph’ and it’s difficult for them to tell whether or not a plunge fits properly or not because the wire sits so low anyway.

A.G.B – What is the reason women do not get professionally fitted? Nowadays, almost every department store offers such services free of charge.
KN – Women do not like to be told they are wrong. They often feel that because they have been fitted once, that’s it, and they hang on to that size forever. We think we know our bodies best. And we do. But, if we’ve been given false information from the start, it’s very difficult to comprehend the change. Most women are delighted after a fitting as nine times out of ten they are smaller in the back and bigger in the cup. And it doesn’t hurt. Properly fitted bras should never hurt. But some can feel affronted, and alarmed. They need a longer explanation, and, mostly, just more time to look at themselves in properly fitting underwear!

A.G.B – What is the basic knowledge we should know before bra shopping?
KN – There are two very simple rules. The wire should never touch breast tissue. It should run from the breast bone to the side of your ribcage, just under your arm. If, when you push the wire in at the side, your breast moves, the cup size is too small. If you think about it, it’s pretty self explanatory, the tissue in our breasts is sensitive, and having a metal wire pushing on them for over 50 years (in total, potentially) is not going to do them any good! Secondly, 80% of your support needs to come from the back band so this needs to be SNUG! You should only be able to pull it an inch away from your body at the back. Any further and it’s too big. Always hook it on the loosest hook when you first try it on, as with time, washing and wearing the elastic will soften and that’s when the other hooks come into play. Try on a variety of styles, balcony, full-cup and demi-cup. Avoid fitting into a plunge as these are not good indicators because you can’t fully tell where the wire would lie against the breast bone.

A.G.B – There is a trend of wearing one size “fits all supported vests”. What is your opinion about this?
KN – The trend for this has come because women are finding their bras uncomfortable. In my opinion, that’s because they’ve been badly fitted! These tops are fine for wearing around the house etc. but offer almost no support, so should not be used as an alternative to a bra.

A.G.B – What type of bra is best?
It’s a very personal thing, but most women find the balcony style best suited to their shape. On being properly fitted, a lot of women have gone up to a cup size that doesn’t tend to come in a padded or moulded style, which is often new to them. Soft cup is much better for you breasts. It helps retrain the upper pectoral muscles and keeps them perky and proud for longer!

A.G.B – Is there a most common bra size?
KN – There is. It’s a 34B. But can I tell you a secret? It’s not a real size! Let me break it down, a 34 back equates to roughly a UK14; if you are a 14 it is highly unlikely you are as small as a B at the front. Most women who wear a 34B are in fact, a 32E. Likewise, women who wear a 34C are often a 32F. I would say, realistically, that the UK’s most common size is between a 32E, 34E and 32F. These are not ‘big’ sizes. They are not the sizes of Page 3 girls, they are regular sizes.

A.G.B – How often should we check our bra size?
KN- Ideally, every time you go bra shopping you should ask the specialist to double check your size. However, if you are confident in the size you’ve been properly fitted into, and can remember in your mind’s eye what a good fit feels and looks like then you may just need a fitting when your body changes. It is very important to be fitted for maternity bras, nursing bras and eventually, regular bras after things have returned to ‘normal’. Your body changes a lot during pregnancy and in the period after so it’s really important that you take care of you breasts. Similarly, after any form of breast surgery it is so important that you get fitted. There are different types of bras for all of the above circumstances, but you need advice on which is best for your shape.

A.G.B – Can you recommend some good places, brands…?
KN- Well, ‘good places’ depend on good people; who know what they are talking about and teach you about what exactly you are looking for in a bra. If a bra fitter approaches you with a tape measure, RUN! This is not an accurate way of fitting bras. Any fitter worth their salt will fit you by eye. I can fit you with your coat on. Brands I think are great include Aubade, Elle MacPherson, Mimi Holliday, Fleur of England and Fauve. All are excellently made with beautiful fabrics and good support. There are two Polish brands that are the talk of the blogosphere at the moment. Ewa Michalak and Kris Line offer bras that start from a 28 back and cup sizes A to N. They are also beautiful.

A.G.B- Can we recycle such items like a bra?
KN – We can yes! They can be donated to specialist charities such as Smalls for All who send lightly used bras and new knickers to Africa where women do not have them. It’s an important charity because not only is this a health and hygiene issue, it’s also a social one. Women (in Africa) who own underwear are seen as having someone to care for them, a husband, brother or father and this makes them less vulnerable.

A.G.B – Do you have any suggestions for how to look after our bras, how to wash them to make them last longer?

KN – I know it’s annoying, but bras need to be handwashed! I mentioned this to my flatmate the other day and she said “Well, I put them on the handwash setting in the washing machine?” This doesn’t count! Bottom line is that the elastic loses a little bit of tension every time you wash it in warm water. And while the handwash setting on the washing machine is good for delicates, it’s much too long a time for your bras to be in water. I accidently put a Mimi Holliday bra in once and watched hopelessly as it twirled around and around in the soapy water. I could’ve cried. As such, handwash them in cold water as this shocks the elastic back and increases the life of your bra.

Two customers. Two nationalities. Two "size 34B"s.

So it turns out M&S et al aren't the only ones who can fit for sh*t. Also joining that club are Canadian lingerie firm la Vie en Rose and department store Nordstrom in the States .

First out of the gates, Canada. Lovely customer who said she regularly bought Elle Macpherson at home but the prices were three times higher than they are in the UK. Miss Mac clearly doesn't like Canada, talk about a raw deal. Anyway, she told me she'd been fitted at LVER as a "standard 34B". I told her to try on a fresh one and shout me in. Bang on a 30D. "Let me just grab another style for you madam". Thirty seconds later, "Oh, that fits perfect!" "Madam, that's a 30D" "Really? But it fits so well..." And then came the explanation of what she was looking for in a fit and where the support should come from and la di da. I asked her if this had ever been explained to her; "No, they just told me my size and handed me a bunch of bras". Great. But she left happy! And with two Elle Macs, a Simone Perele and an order for a Mimi Holliday.

Next, a girl was in the department clutching a few bras and I approached her to ask if she needed any help or advice with regards to size. "Nope" came the rather snooty reply "I'm a bra fitter" I took said bras from her, peeking at the size and put them in a fitting room for her. "Just let me know if you'd like me to double check the sizing" "I'll be fine, thanks". Disgruntled that she was a) wearing the wrong size; b) potentially telling other people to wear the wrong size and c) ignoring me (I'm sorry, I'm female, never forget we can't be ignored) I stood and waited for her to finish trying on. "Excuse me, can I try this in a 34C?" She called, thrusting a Dentelle bra at me. "Of course, madam" My chance! I must take it! I scooped up the offending Dentelle 34C (I love the bra, loathe the size) and grabbed a Simone Perele for her too. "Try the black one (Simone P) on first and give me shout". Two minutes later the door cracked open. "This fits perfectly, I guess I'm a C now". Now, this could potentially have been awkward. The girl had never actually asked for a fitting. And in fact had actually specified she didn't need to be fitted. But I couldn't help myself. I feel like I've taken a sort of hippocratic oath never to harm anyones boobs "Actually, that's a 30E" Deep breath. "Oh, really? Wow. You're good. Thank you". Smiles all round. Phew. I'm not getting my P45 for offending a customer.

She bought the Simone Perele. At the till I asked her where she worked, Nordstrom, and how they fitted. They fit with a measuring tape. (cue look of reeling disgust) and use a Chantelle bra to measure the cup. Bizarre. As she left I apologised for being sneaky, she laughed and said she shouldn't have been so stubborn in the first place. All's well that ends well. With any luck, they'll head home and spread the news!

Ninja
xx
#34Bdoesntexist

Marks and Spencers, I'm pissed at you.

I have been meaning to start this blog for a while but wasn't entirely sure when or how to start. I wanted to start with an upbeat tale of fitting. Which I suppose could be my own...in short I was 'fitted' at a 36A/34B for years. Then I got a job in lingerie store and was promptly fitted, correctly, at a 32E. WHOOP. But that's not the story I've brought you here to read. "I was fitted at Marks and Spencers" has long been a phrase qualified bra-fitters loathe to hear. It's like saying Macbeth in the theatre. It's met with a sympathetic smile and an encouragement to get in the fitting room. It's a situation we make light of. "It's okay, we've all done it!" And then proceed to inform the customer after an in-depth and informative consultation that they are, in fact, a 32F. "Silly M&S!" Yes, silly, but no harm done.

Something happened yesterday that made me see past red, onto purple. I felt so angry I had to go sit in my stockroom to calm down. And I felt powerless to do anything. Then I remembered I needed a story to open my underwear blog with. Read, and share it. Not for me, but for the thousands of women affected by this. A customer wandered into my department and asked if we stocked any 40 backs. She was between a 14/16 I could see so I knew immediately the back size was wrong. She proceeded to tell me she needed a 40A. 'Hmmm' I thought, 'she doesn't look sizes with Mike Tindall but we'll roll with it'. "I have a prosthesis; Marks and Spencers fitted me at a 40A". I felt rage gnawing at me. A 40A?? A 40A!? I asked the customer her dress size and, as suspected, she was a 14/16.

"They sold me one a while ago but it hurt me" More rage. "I went up a size in my prosthesis but I still couldn't make it work" Deep breaths. I managed to get her into the fitting room and into a 36. The back was fine but on this occasion I didn't have any non-wired bras. I could see clearly that the customer was a 38E/ 36F. I showed her what she was looking for in a fit and listed on paper brands she should look out for. I advised her on her size and made and appointment for her at the nearest Bravissimo. They are, like me, fully trained in dealing with post-mastectomy patients and know exactly how to fit and advise according to the stage they are at in their recovery. And, if a sales assistant didn't know what to do, I have no doubt that they would've asked for help.

She told me that the Glasgow Western Infirmary had advised she go there (three cheers for the GWI!). She told me she'd just 'always gone' to M&S and trusted them to know what they were doing. Even now, I feel enraged by this. This woman has gone through something traumatic. She has physically LOST part of her body. And by proceeding to fit her badly M&S are literally hurting her further.

Marks and Spencers should not be allowed to fit post-surgery customers if they are not properly trained and equipped to do so. It's not fair. It's adding to her trauma. It's inhumane if you consider she has to expose herself to a stranger, trust that stranger, and be fitted into something that doesn't support her, doesn't aid with recovery and instead HURTS.
REALLY?

If you, or someone you know has gone through this surgery and needs advice on what to look for in aftercare bras, please get in touch. It's a part of my job I have also really enjoyed. Getting women back to being comfortable in their own skin. In their own underwear! Making bra shopping something to be enjoyed and not feared! There are plenty of bra fitters out there who know what to do in these situations. But those that don't, need to be honest, hold their hands up and say 'I'm going to get a more experience bra fitter to help you, but may I watch so I can learn?'

Furthermore, if you have had bad experiences after surgery with a bra fitter, please let me know! Similarly, if you felt well cared for tell me who they are too!

So that's the first post. I'm still mad, but we're at a low simmer now.
Back soon, Ninja x